Rejoice & Weep

Sometimes in life we feel inadequate like we don't quite meet the mark, but in reality we are made perfect by God the one who,loves us the most. Even if you don't believe in God, or a superpower being you can still take this message for what it's worth and apply it to your own life. It can be really hard to not feel good enough or worthy enough to achieve something you desperately want. It's even harder when people are tearing you down, and saying those things. Let me tell you something about me, all my life I have felt like I wasn't good enough for anything. I felt worthless, and most of the time I think I wont achieve anything. That's really hard to put on yourself, but for me, those words weren't just coming from me, they were coming from a lot of people around me. For awhile I listened to them, and it tore me apart each and every single day, until I said enough is enough and I let those things motivate and push me even harder. Don't get me w...

"Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep" Romans 12:15 This verse is one of my favorite verses of the bible, because it is so true in our everyday lives. I feel in this society we always compare our lives to others. We always push them down when they are happy, or tell them you have it worse when they are going through a storm. What we should be doing is when someone is happy-celebrate them, and with them. If someone is in a time of sadness, we need to be there for them and empathize. We need to stop focusing on us so much, and realize there are other people in this world that go through highs and lows too. This isn't to say that your highs and lows don't matter, but it shouldn't separate people. These times should bring us closer as people as a society. I get so sad for those who think they are in this all by them selves, and that their feelings are diminished, or put down. I've had times where I was going through a rough time,...

Love is such an interesting thing to me. Everyone describes it in different ways, and everyone looks at love in a different way. The internet defines love as "an intense feeling of deep affection". But, is that always the case? I think love is an individual feeling. It can be an attraction, a force, a deep care, a general feeling. How do we differentiate between liking something, and loving something? Do we just know? Or is it something more. Love is a funny thing. Do we really have to love our self, before we love others? I don't think so. People experience love in many different ways. For some it's time, for some its words, others it's gifts, and some just want a warm embrace. I do not think there can be just one definition for love. I think we have to experience it for our self, and then figure it out. We have to experience the flutters in our heart, the heart break when in it ends. The excitemen...

Everyone always asks me why I want to be a teacher. They don't get paid very much, and are treated like crap most of the time. For me, it's not about the money, or the way kids treat me, it's all about the impact I could make on future leaders, doctors, or other future teachers. For me, I could care less about money, it's all about the connection I can make, and the lessons I can teach. I want to be a teacher, so that I can be that person that pushes someone, and believes in them. I want to show them someone does care, and someone is rooting for them. I know I can be a good teacher. While I have been in high school, teachers have made some of the biggest impacts on me, and I'm forever grateful. They have pushed me, believed in me,and have shown me some of the deepest care, and I want to be like with my future students. I'm not made for sitting at a desk all day, wasting my life away while everyone else is out changing lives. It's not bad if you sit at a des...

Senior year. Also known as the year of many lasts. The last football game, school dance, sport practice, last meeting for a club you've grown to love, last passing time, and last time your friends are all together (maybe). Senior year is full of bittersweet moments. So many new adventures, and so many of adventures coming to the end. I've always known that my time is almost up, but I don't think I truly understood until Friday night. The Student Council lock-in, seniors gave advice and shared stories, tears were shed, and hugs were given. I never realized how many people have changed my life throughout my high school career. I only have a few months left, and that is so crazy to me. I have spent 4 years within those walls, and within a matter of a couple months it will all be over. It is such a odd feeling, and indescribable feeling. I'm sad, excited, scared, and so many feelings are within me. When they say Senior year goes by fast, they are not lying. Even just high ...

Sometimes when I wake up, I wake up in a very dark place; and lately that has been happening basically everyday. When bad things happen they seem to hit me one after another, after another, after another. I've got to tell you, You get kind of sick of it after awhile, and eventually you almost feel numb. I want to cry, but I can't. I want to at least pretend to be happy, but I can't even do that. I don't want to seem like an attention seeker, but I literally have nothing left of me left. The only thing that I am holding on to is God, and the people I have in my life. I have little motivation to do anything...even my school work. Which if you knew me, you would know that is completely and utterly un like me. I have no idea where these feelings are coming from. I mean I have my guesses, but you know? I'm stressed out with school, I'm giving it my all, but my scores aren't showing that. There is a bunch going on with me medically, and there is only so much I c...

First of all, the things being said in this blog are very sensitive, and may be triggering to some. Please proceed with caution, and if you cannot emotionally handle reading this, please click out, I will completely understand, and I hope you have a beautiful day. It is currently 9:47 at night, and I felt lead to write this. Maybe it may help me, or even someone else. Either way...I’m good. They say it take 7 years for every cell in your body to be replaced. I cannot wait until I reach the 7 year mark. I don’t want to give what happened to me a title, because I have no idea what to classify it as. I’m also not going to share when this happened. I do not really want to share that, so that this does not have negative reactions, Basically I had a male my age touch me, grab me in inappropriate spots, say sexual things to me, and eventually stuck a pencil down my jeans. This male did not have my permission to do these things. He just did them. It went on for a few months, a...